A Life Less Blog

your side of the bed was cold when i woke up today
i reached over for the reassurance of your hand and
grabbed only sheets

i didn’t want to open my eyes because then i
would have to see the lack of your breathing, bump of covers

i clapped my hands over my ears, because i didn’t want
to not hear the soothing rhythm of your breath
in and out, out and in, your leg jerking periodically
as you fought your own demons in your dreams.

i stayed still, forcing my legs to press together tightly
instead of allowing my curious foot to wander over to your side
and my disreputable leg to try to twine around your own leg, pulling
you toward me, your warm half-sleep filled arms wrapping around my waist
and your scratchy morning beard tickling my neck as you buried your face in my back.

i didn’t want to wake up today and face another day without you
so i stayed in bed, drew the curtains, and hoped to see you, and feel you again in my dreams.