i never knew
boy or girl
i only knew i loved you
i only knew i wanted you
i only knew the feelings you made me feel
the foods i wanted to eat so you
would grow big and strong
i made you eat your vegetables too early…
is that why you left?
i never knew that a bond with you could be so strong
boy or girl
son or daughter
my blood rushed in my veins
it scared me how fast my heat beat for you
did it scare you too?
is that why you left?
i tried to calm my breathing
and take it easy;
to fill my head with benign thoughts and
empty my brain of worry.
i was too much of a
mother
to you, before you were even born…
is that why you left?
did the walls of your safe haven
feel like they were closing in?
did you feel smothered or chastised?
did i love you too much?
did i not eat enough?
eat too much?
worry too much?
love too much?
cry too much?
did you look deep into my mind and
find you were not planned and
take this as a sign to start your
departure?
when i noticed the blood,
i knew something was wrong
i knew you weren’t happy,
i knew you
boy
or
girl
son or
daughter
had
already
left.